Confidence is not competition

By Kerryn Vaughan

18th March 2026

Confidence is far from needing to compete with others.

True confidence is internally focused and about knowing who you are and what matters to you. It's about steady presence and trusting your ability to navigate whatever comes your way even if you don’t know what’s fully required of the situation.

Competition, on the other hand, is externally focused. It measures worth by comparing, ranking, and outperforming others. It thrives on the idea that if someone else shines, you must dim. This is not confidence.

When you’re confident, someone else’s success doesn’t threaten you - it inspires you and you want to celebrate their wins with them. 

This was one of the incredibly valuable conversations we had at Heartprint Cambodia in November, during my Confidence CAP staff training. And wow, does this group know how to confidently lift each other up!

The next time you see somebody strut into a room, trying to prove how confident they are, don’t be fooled and don’t compete to be like them.

When you walk into a room, know there is no need for comparison or competition - you are enough just the way you are.

Kerryn Vaughan is the author of ‘Magnificent Kids!’ and ‘Get Off The Bench!’, co-founder of Girls With Hammers, and host of Get Off The Bench Podcast.

Kerryn is a leadership facilitator and the founder of Confident Leaders Program and The Confidence CAP, as well as an accredited DISC ADVANCED® consultant.